BOISE, Idaho — The job of a first responder sees disaster, grief and heartache on a daily basis. That kind of commitment and dedication can take a toll on a person.
"You might experience seven to 10 traumatic events in your life," Rob Christensen, an Idaho firefighter, told KTVB. "It's like 1,000 in my career."
Christensen is a second-generation firefighter who has tried dealing with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) in various forms, including meditation and vocal therapy.
"I started getting counseling five years into it (the job)," he said. "My first counseling appointment... I was ashamed that I had to go there that I was weaker than everybody. But what I soon learned was that the clinician I chose, saw other first responders."
She told him he was alone, he said.
A few years ago, Christensen wanted to add another tool to his toolbox - Ketamine therapy.
He had hoped it would help with some of the PTSD and Post-Traumatic Stress Injury (PTSI) he was experiencing, he said.
Ketamine is a controlled substance that is only legal to use in a medical setting. Christensen underwent the therapy at a Boise Ketamine clinic.
He said he knew ketamine to be a "party drug" but that this showed him a whole other benefit to it.
"I was scared," he said. "Was I going to be me when I came out?"
For six weeks in 2022, Christensen underwent assisted ketamine therapy in a Boise Ketamine clinic. A combination of preparatory psychotherapy sessions, a number of intramuscular and intravenous injections, and solo psychotherapy to end it.
He explained his experience, like emptying a backpack.
"We just keep throwing rocks in there and pretty soon we can't carry it anymore and it's going to break us down to where we can't think straight," he said. "We can't sleep. We are looking for self-medication."
To add to this process - Brandon Kapelow, a Wyoming filmmaker and photographer, wanted to catch it all on camera.
"I'm a suicide loss survivor," Kapelow told KTVB. "I lost my dad, Steven, to suicide when I was 12 years old. And that kind of put me on a path where I am just very passionate about mental health topics."
His source and their home were a specific choice for Kapelow.
"I came to learn that the American West has the nation's highest rates of suicide," Kapelow said. "I wanted to tell a story about psychedelic therapy."
Before Christensen started ketamine therapy, he wasn't sure what he'd get out of it.
"To be honest, I felt like I had worked through all of what I was carrying," he said. "I thought my backpack was pretty empty. But I found that the bottom of that thing was some hard cement that just wasn't out yet. "
Kapelow thought this was a chance to show the people of Idaho what he got to see.
"The Bay Area don't need more convincing about psychedelics, there's already huge adoption there," he said. "Whereas a place like Idaho, you know, there might not be as much common sort of acceptance and understanding around these compounds."
After the ketamine therapy sessions, Christensen said he'd be exhausted but also felt lighter.
"For me, it was a profound you know, piece of my healing," he said. "I realized that, oh, wow, things are a little bit brighter, music's a little bit better, right foods a little bit better. And, just my gratitude, just the love I had, my heart was even more than prior to."
The process also showed Kapelow a few things about himself.
"There were certainly moments watching him go through the therapy, where I felt like I was able to relate through moments of my own experience, with my own trauma," he said. "It actually opened me to the possibility of doing my own course of ketamine therapy to treat my own PTSD."
For Christensen - he wanted others to know support is out there for everyone.
"I had a dear friend call me and said, 'You saved my life,'" he said.
His friend watched the documentary twice, Christensen said.
"He just couldn't control his emotions," he said. " He was crying. His wife came home. And finally, it was out on the table. And he had to say how he felt that he was considering suicide."
It was that moment for Christensen.
"To play a small role into where he's at now, and he's gotten help, and he is back at work," he said. "It's just I'm grateful for that."
With help from the New York Times (NYT), Kapelow published the short film in March of this year. You can watch the short film here: Opinion | Ketamine Therapy Offers Hope for This Emergency Worker - The New York Times (nytimes.com)
Local Idahoans will also get to watch the film in person at The Idaho Film Society on Friday night. This will be the first ever in-person showing of the show.
The first showing is at 7 p.m., and tickets are sold out. However, they added a second showing at 8:30 p.m.
In between the two showings will be a questions-and-answer format, where people can ask Christensen, Kapelow, and Dr. Michael Spiro, who performed the ketamine therapy on Christensen.
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